*Why do places that advertise walk-ins welcome not have ANY available appointments when you call them? Had I walked in instead, would they have had appointment slots open? I really don't understand how a phone call 15 minutes in advance would be different than a walk-in.
*I have had a headache ALL week. This is a lovely migraine on my right side, coupled with sinus pain and pressure, PLUS this pain that goes up the back of my neck and the back of my head on my right side. I am taking everything I can for the sinus congestion, pain and pressure. Yesterday someone actually had the nerve to give me a dirty look when I was irrigating my nose at a stop light. (I wasn't using my full-on Neti Pot, but just snorting some saline spray. Also, the same day, another person, in another town, gave me a stare when I applied deodarant at a stop light. What is wrong with a little personal maintenance in the car?
* I hate people who have those Hang Up and Drive bumper stickers on their cars. They make me feel guilty when I see them and I am talking on my phone. And you know what? It seems to me that a lot of times, these people are smoking. Do they not think that their smoking while driving is a distraction? Disgusting. At least my cell phone doesn't stink.
And, also, who are they kidding? It is like fighting the ocean tides or something... EVERYONE has a cell phone, and I am sure that pretty soon it will be acceptable to chat on it while having sex. I have been in many public restrooms while people are talking on their cells. Just peeing away, and chattering to so-and-so on their phones. Or I've been in dressing rooms and had to listen to someone trying on clothes while trying to have an uninterrupted conversation on their cell. I think deep down, we are all becoming afraid of being alone. Or really, being alone, in the midst of other people. Because then there are witnesses to your loneliness. And also, if you have your phone up to your ear, there is just no pressure to be social. You don't have to make small talk or eye contact with anyone, because you have an automatic out. If you go shopping alone, you better have your cell phone up to your ear, because otherwise people might think you are a loser who has no friends. Sit in a waiting room, without talking to someone on your phone? Imagine. Sometimes I wonder if people just pretend someone is on the other line.
*I really like coffee. I like it so much that I think an empty bag of coffee makes a great air freshener for my car. I mean it smells better than the petrified french fries and chicken nuggets that are probably lurking under my kids' car seats.
*I really hate my gerbils. It was really, really stupid of me to get them. They just add chaos to our lives, and it is such a pain to clean the nasty cage. Plus, they just make me feel guilty all the time. I also hate my cats. It was really, really, really stupid of me to get them. They just add chaos and guilt to my life also.
*I really don't want to have a third child. I can barely keep up with taking care of the two I already have, and their needs are changing so much that having an infant again would be like trying to live in two countries at once. Or something. Also, I have no room. I have no room in my car for a third car seat. I have no room in my house. I have no room in my budget. I am turning 30 this summer, and I had always said, I want to be done having kids by the time I turn 30 (this plan was made when I got married at the age of 21, which canceled out my original plan to get married at 25, and have kids in my early 30s). And lately it seems like I have just barely enough sanity to get through one week at a time. You throw a baby in there? I just don't know what would happen. And I am seriously concerned for myself if I have to go through the sleep deprivation of pregnancy and having a nursing infant again.
But it is just SO hard to really give up the possibility of having one more baby. I have a long list of reasons why NOT to, and really no good reason to have one, but I can't seem to feel settled about our decision to say, OK, we are done. I guess I kept hoping that it would just accidentally happen and we would not have to make the decision. And now that time is running our for an accident to happen, it just seems kind of sad. I don't know, I can't imagine Anna being a middle child. Literally, I can't imagine it. And I never wanted to have a third child so far from my other two, because I always felt (as did my husband) as the third and much younger child, that I was completely left out and didn't really fit into the family.
So to sum up: I like some things, I hate some things, I am bothered by some things. And I have a headache.
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